BEST CURRVE Checklist for Self-Editing

What I Learned Judging the Edgars

Guest Blog Post by Bradley Harper —

It’s 2020, and I’m sheltering at home with nothing to do … but read 380 books. I was one of seven judges assigned to evaluate entries for the Edgar Award for Best Novel. I was directly assigned one-third of that total, and any that the other judges felt merited serious consideration were assigned to me as well. I actually cracked open about 185. I read maybe 35 all the way to the end. 

In 2021–22 I attended a master’s program in creative writing at Edinburgh Napier University in Edinburgh. All students are given classes in didactics, so that if we didn’t write a runaway best seller right away, we could survive as teachers. As a class assignment, I analyzed the major reasons I put a book down before I finished it. Being in Scotland, I used the double “R” for the last piece. These reasons are my own opinion, but I think you’ll find some truth in each of them. Here goes! 

B is for Boring 

Boring can be for a couple of reasons. One is too much passive voice. Passive voice can become the language of lawyers and bureaucrats, people who want to avoid responsibility. Own your story! 

Or the early part of the book is filled with scenes where nothing changes. Too many writers fill pages and pages of background information thinking it will help the reader get it. At the end of the scene, the characters are in the same place doing the same thing and there’s no suspense for what happens next. 

E is for Efficient Word Use 

Hemingway was terse because he began his writing career as a war correspondent, sending his dispatches by telegram back to his editor. He had to pay for every word. Prune, prune, prune. The French pilot, Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, wrote the children’s classic, The Little Prince, using a spare language that still charms the world today. In his memoir, Wind, Sand, and Stars, he wrote, “Perfection is not achieved when nothing more can be added, but when nothing more can be taken away.” 

The average American today has an attention span of seven seconds. 

A goldfish has nine. So, keep it tight and keep it moving. 

And I’ll mention adverbs while I’m on it. Scrub your manuscript for “-ly” words. He walked slowly. We inherited a rich language. Use it. He sauntered, limped, trudged, moseyed…. You get the idea. 

The same for “very.” Mark Twain said whenever you are tempted to use the word, use “Damn” instead, so you can be sure the editor will take it out. 

It was very cold… No. It was frigid. The wind ripped through your coat to freeze your heart. Let off the brake and use all those vulgar Anglo-Saxon terms or elegant Norman words, but don’t cheapen your prose with a limp “very.” Your characters deserve more from you than that. 

S is for Senses 

You have five senses, (unless you’re psychic). Use them in your description, otherwise you’re like a golfer who only uses his driver and his putter. I recommend you take your MC and mentally take them for a ride in your story world … blindfolded. What do they hear? Is the ride smooth or rough? Are they hot or cold? Is the seat leather or unpadded rough wood? And what do they smell to tell them where they are? The olfactory nerve provides us with the sense of smell and is the most primitive of all our input. Earthworms have an olfactory nerve. 

Unlike the other nerves that go to the cerebral cortex to be analyzed, the olfactory nerve feeds into our reptilian brain. Smells are often tied to emotion that bypasses our analytical mind. That’s why realtors tell you to bake bread in your house when you’re trying to sell it. The buyer gets a feeling of safety from the aroma.  

But yes, visual description is important too, but don’t be lazy with it. As another exercise, place your MC on a beach, alone. Describe the scene, then he sees a figure rushing towards him from, say, a half mile away. Describe what he can see. 

Then bring the figure closer, say two hundred yards. It’s your MC’s sworn enemy. Describe what he can see from here. How is the figure moving? What can you tell about their clothing? 

Now twenty feet away and they’re drawing their sword, axe, bow, or iPhone. Describe the sweat on their face. Their breathing. (Don’t use very or an LY word.) 

Such details will give your reader a sense of perspective. 

T is for Telling 

EX: Helen was angry.  

Our brain is highly attuned to reading social cues. By describing Helen without stating her emotional state, our reader analyzes the picture you paint and infers from that how she’s feeling. By engaging the reader in making sense of what’s being described, you make them a collaborator. It becomes their story as much as it is yours. 

If you just tell them, they lose interest as fast as the kid in the back row in algebra class. Show your work. 

C is for Confusing 

I’ve been told how wonderful Russian Literature is. I’ll have to take their word for it as I can never keep track of the characters. Strunk and White, in their classic book The Elements of Style, say you should think of yourself as a guide, leading the reader through a swamp. If you let them go astray for even a moment, they may fall into the mire and drown. 

Always make it clear who’s in the room, who’s talking, and who they’re talking to. And while I’m at it, I agree with Elmore Leonard. Never use anything but “said” for attribution. Otherwise, you’re just showing off and drawing the reader’s attention to the least important word in your sentence. 

U is for Unbelievable 

Don’t make your characters too good. If they’re a good pickpocket, make them show how good they are before you use it as a major plot point. But give them some flaws, too.  

R is for Reveal 

I’ve given talks on this checklist, and in my PowerPoint slide presentation, here is where I have a picture of Darth Vader. If you don’t know what reveal I’m referring to, I’ll give you a hint. It starts with “I am,” and ends with “your father.” 

A good reveal not only changes everything that comes next, but makes you look back at what happened before and see it in a totally new light. Don’t give that power away. Imagine if Obi-Wan had told Luke Skywalker on page twelve who his father was. It makes me cringe to even think about it.  

My point is not to tell the reader the juicy stuff until they absolutely have to. As one writer said, “Make them cry, make them laugh, make them wait.” 

One book I put down after less than twenty pages is a great example: A bomb is found in a crowded office building. Good opening. 

It’s blinking. Oooh, tension mounts. 

The Bomb Squad arrives. Here comes the good stuff! 

Then I got a three-page backstory on the female bomb tech, her tour in Afghanistan, her PTSD, and I completely lost interest. Is the bomb still there? I don’t know, and frankly, I no longer care. 

Probably important stuff to know, but not then. Keep me in the scene until it’s accomplished what it’s supposed to. 

R is for Repetition 

Simple stuff, but it happens more than you’d think, using the same word too often. It calls attention to itself. I worked with one woman who used the word “actually” at least every other sentence. I quit listening to what she’d say and started counting how often she said that word. I don’t think I’m cruel, but conversation with her was painful. 

Invest in a thesaurus. 

V is for Vary 

Not words. I’ve said my piece on that, but this is about sentence length. Break it up with long sentences to set up a short, punchy sentence. Repeating the rhythm of your sentences can cause the eyelids to droop, the mind to wander, the book to slip from your reader’s attention, and then from their grasp. 

E is for Ending 

Put your most powerful word at the end of a sentence. The most powerful sentence at the end of your paragraph. 

Your most powerful paragraph at the end of the chapter. 

And they’ll turn to the next one. 

That’s it. I’m old, cranky, and opinionated, but I hope you found something useful in all this. 

And if you don’t own a copy of Strunk and White’s The Elements of Style, do not pass go until you do. It’s the single best reference you’ll ever find on how to write clearly and tightly. 

All the best, and keep writing!